Finding Belonging in the ‘Not Quite Yet’

Out of Place – Celia’s Story

Unsettled and out of place. 

This is how I would describe to you how I’ve felt in this season of life. 

My husband and I are going through a transitional season, where we both know where we want to be but we’re waiting, sitting, in the not quite yet. 

Moving in faith

We heard the Lord calling us to move to the Indianapolis area to be closer to family in the summer of 2019. My husband and I heard God clearly stating that it would be two more years of living in Warsaw, Indiana, then it would be time to pack up and move on. 

Well, friend, it’s been two years. 

Trusting in the Lord’s timing, we decided to put our house up for sale in February of this year. We were absolutely thrilled when it sold only two days later, confirming that we were, in fact, headed in the right direction. 

So, soon afterwards, the house hunting in Indy began! 

We started off excited and hopeful, eyes wide with wonder at the thought of a new adventure in a new city. With each new home our realtor walked us through, we began talking about what we would do to make the fireplace look a little more updated, or whether or not we were going to replace the cabinets in the kitchen or simply just paint them. 

The first few denials were disappointing, but pretty painless, as this was just the beginning of our house hunting journey. Our realtor assured us that our offers were strong, it would just take time to find the right seller. 

After about the fourth and fifth denial, our hearts were a little heavy, but our friends and family kept encouraging us that those homes just weren’t the right fit. God had a home, and He would lead us to it. 

Well, it’s now the middle of April, and we’ve submitted eleven offers on eleven different homes and have gotten outbid on every single one. 

Did I mention that we have to be out of our home in Warsaw by the end of May?

After the eleventh denial, the panic started to sink in and peace was quickly dissipating. 

Doubt and God’s timing

I thought the Lord said two years, hasn’t it been two years?

Did we hear Him incorrectly?

What is He doing, and what if we can’t find a house in time?!

Those are the doubt-filled questions that have been running through our minds the past few weeks. 

Even the encouragement from our realtor, friends and family is starting to sound a little hesitant and discouraged coming out of their mouths. 

I felt panicked and rushed, like I was running out of time and it was my responsibility to make everything happen how I thought it should go. 

Then, one early morning, I woke to a gentle whisper of the Holy Spirit…

Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. (Matthew 11:28-30 MSG)

He was calling me to be still, to rest even though it felt like the last thing I should’ve been doing. 

He was calling me to trust Him. 

Because, friend, true rest only happens when we fully surrender control to God. 

Just because this process has not gone according to my plan, doesn’t mean His plan isn’t good. It doesn’t mean that God has dropped the ball and forgot what He said to my husband and I two years ago. 

He isn’t sitting on His throne, smirking and shrugging His shoulders saying,

Well, oops, hope you can figure this one out! 

He is right here with me in this process, in these disappointments, in these doubts and questions and frustrations. 

And He is working all things together for my good even though I can’t yet see it. 

He works, He plans and He orchestrates so I don’t have to. 

My only requirement right now is to show up, be faithful where He calls me and rest in knowing that He never stops working on my behalf. 

I am going to choose to trust Him in this season, and as I unclench my weary fists, I feel the peace of His presence drawing near. 

My desire to rush is gradually being replaced with the slow, steady pace of my Savior. 

And as I learn to sync my pace to His and pivot my perspective to look through the lens of His divine timing, I am given a supernatural peace. 

A peace that surpasses all understanding and knowledge. 

I’m realizing now, in this season of my life, feeling unsettled and out of place is evidence that God is on the move. 

It’s God’s way of showing me that I don’t belong to my circumstances, I belong to Him. 

The choice before us

I have two choices:

1. I can choose to cling to my frustration and contempt for how I thought this process was supposed to go and miss how He moves in the not yet and right now

Or

2. I can choose to let my expectations fall into the hands of my Savior and choose to rest in Him as I wait and watch for His plan to unfold

Because He has so much to show me in the not yet and right now, so many blessings to pour out and so many ways in which He desires to pull me closer. 

So, dear one, if you find yourself feeling unsettled or out of place in your current season of life, take heart. 

God wants to meet you right here, right now. 

He’s calling you to lay down your expectations and doubts and lean into His arms of grace where the rhythm He rocks you to is slow and unforced, steady and reliable as He gently whispers,

Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. (Matthew 11:28-30 MSG)

Xoxo, 

Celia 

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Meet Celia Miller

Celia is a wife, writer and avid lover and pursuer of Jesus. Her and her husband reside in small town Indiana with their two very cute, but very ornery, fur babies. She works full time in the health insurance industry but her true passion lies in sharing the heart of Jesus with others through her writing. Celia writes to remind you that you are fiercely beloved and fervently pursued by the One who created you. You can find her over on her blog at celiaamiller.com or go hangout with her on Instagram.

*Feature Photo by Scott Warman on Unsplash